


Alone

by Cdelphiki



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman and Robin (Comics), DC Animated Universe, DCU, Robin: Son of Batman (Comics)
Genre: Angst, Dick Grayson is a Good Brother, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-26
Updated: 2018-03-26
Packaged: 2019-04-08 15:47:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14108742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cdelphiki/pseuds/Cdelphiki
Summary: Damian didn't really know his father.  Why did the man's death make him feel so alone?





	Alone

Mahogany.

That's all Damian saw. Rich, dark, beautiful mahogany. It was just an empty wooden box. Very expensive. Very beautiful. But empty nonetheless.

It was only fitting that they had no body to bury. Nothing would have been good enough for Batman. Nothing would have been good enough for _his_ father.

Damian stood there, staring, studying the grain of wood on the empty box that held so much of him. The service was over and the gravediggers were waiting for the family to leave so they could finish burying his father. But he couldn't bring himself to walk away. The box was empty. Just like him.

Damian should be sad, shouldn't he? His father was dead. People are supposed to be sad when their fathers die. But Damian? Damian just felt... empty. And angry.

He felt angry.

It wasn't fair.

He had only just met his father two months before. He had spent his entire ten years of life admiring him from afar. Training so that he could be worthy of his father's respect. His attention. His love? No. He did not need such childish things. He wanted to be his father's apprentice. His protege. Ten years he had longed for the opportunity to train under him, and the man had rejected him. Tossed him aside. Hated him.

It wasn't fair.

He didn't have enough time to prove himself. Now his father was dead.

What would happen to Damian, now? He would have to return to Mother.

Damian took a sharp breath with that thought. Mother.

He he chosen Father over Mother. He had turned his back on her. She would not easily forgive his disloyalty.

_"Damian," her voice had been sharp. Judging. "Who would you rather be with?"_

_"Do I have to choose?" he had asked, "I'd rather us all be together." Why would she make him choose?_

_"Learn from your father, Damian"_

How could he learn from him now?

He hadn't chosen his father, not really. Mother had chosen for him, although Damian knew deep down, he would have chosen Father himself. He had not learned from Father, either. The man had been distant. Distrustful. Hateful. He had chosen _Drake_ over Damian.

Even after Damian had bested him in battle.

Father had chosen Drake.

Now Father was gone and Damian was alone.

He had been so lost in thought, he didn't hear the footsteps behind him, and was startled when an arm went around his shoulder. Not an attack. A hug?

Damian looked up. _Grayson._ The oldest of Father's _adopted_ 'sons.' The circus trash. Circus trash, street rat, and an imbecile.

_"Blood doesn't make family, Damian." Father had said._

If blood didn't make family, then what did Damian have to connect him to Father? Father _wanted_ the others. Even _Todd._ But not Damian. If blood was nothing, then what was Damian?

The hand on his shoulder squeezed, and Damian realized he was still looking at Grayson.

"It'll be okay," the man said. It sounded sincere, but how could it be okay? Father was dead and he was alone.

"What will happen to me?" he heard himself ask. He sounded so small. So young. So _weak_. Damian hated himself for it.

The hold on his shoulder tightened. "We can worry about that another day."

Damian nodded. It would take them a few days to track down his mother, anyway. Unless. Father kept tabs on her. They probably already knew where she was. "Have you already contacted her, then?"

The man hummed, then asked, "Who?"

"My mother. So she can retrieve me." Retrieve him. Like he were an object. A toy. A weapon. That's all Damian was to his mother. A weapon to wield. With his father, he thought. He thought he could be more than that. Father hadn't wanted a weapon. He didn't even want a soldier.

Damian thought he could be more. Be better. Be _good._ Be a _person_ Father could be proud of. Could love. Like he loved the orphans he adopted. That was such a childish thought.

Now, though. Now he was back to being a thing. A pawn. Nothing.

"No. Do you want to return to your mother?"

Did he?

No. He didn't. He wanted to remain with Father. He just wanted-

Now he could feel the sadness hit. All at once, like a wave crashing over him. With a deep breath, he steadied himself. Fought back the tears, and squashed the treacherous feelings down. He could not afford such luxuries, such weaknesses, if he were to be returning to Mother.

Grayson let go and knelt down before Damian, looking up at him with clear blue eyes. Eyes that Damian wanted to trust. Why? Who was Damian to this man? Nothing. Just the brat who had been causing so many problems lately. The brat they'd all be glad to be rid of.

"Damian," he said, placing his hands on Damian's shoulders, "Do you want to return to the League of Assassins?"

No.

"Where else would I go?" he asked, defeated. His mother would insist on his return. Make him pay for his disloyalty. He had no choice.

"You can stay here if you want." Grayson smiled, a small sad smile.

"How? Father is dead." Damian looked away, finally, and back at the empty casket. There was no body. He couldn't even say goodbye.

"You can live with me."

Damian's gaze snapped back to the man knelt before him. Live with Grayson? He- He wanted Damian?

"Why," he asked. Grayson must have taken it the wrong way. Damian meant why would Grayson want him, not why would Damian choose to stay with him.

Grayson broke eye contact and began brushing at Damian's sleeve. "I- it's just an option. If you want. If you'd rather return to the league, I'll contact your mom. It's just- you don't have to, if you don't want. And if you do, then you change your mind, you can come back. I'll be here. You're always welcome."

His emotions were betraying him again. Tears flooded into his eyes and were threatening to spill out. "Why," he said again, his voice barely audible.

Grayson smiled. "You're my little brother. We're family."

"But-" Damian wanted to protest. _Blood doesn't make family._ What did make family? If not blood, then what? Could they choose their family? Had Grayson just chosen him? "Mother will find out. She will come for me."

"I'll protect you." Grayson's eyes were sharp. Intense. Caring. Immensely comforting.

Damian shook his head. Grayson would be killed. Mother would kill him easily. Without a second thought. He could not protect Damian. He would die for Damian, and why? How had Damian earned his loyalty? The stinging in his eyes got worse, and then ceased as his tears forced their way out.

"Hey," Grayson said, pulling Damian into a hug, "Everything will be okay." His embrace was strong and warm.

And for a moment, Damian believed it. For the first time in his life, he felt safe. Wanted. He wasn't alone.

"No," he choked out between sobs, "I want to stay here."

**Author's Note:**

> I've been on a Damian & Dick kick lately, especially reading about their time as Batman and Robin, and this little scene popped into my head at work today. Talk about a depressing scene to think about all day! Ha. I kind of thought of this as the moment their entire relationship started. 
> 
> It's certainly a throw-back timeline-wise, and probably definitely doesn't follow cannon, considering I'm pretty sure I meshed together the animated movies with the comics. But hey, that's why they call it fan fiction. 
> 
> Thanks for reading. <3


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